This year has been another complicated passage of time, rife with economic and environmental anxiety, genocidal violence supported by Western interests, and the shuttering of several beloved publications, but also the creation of MANY new publications and Substack newsletters, shows of heartening resilience and solidarity across the globe, and new media to inspire, comfort, and guide us through the years to come, which we’ve curated a selection of below.
This year, we read paradigm-shifting books of poetry, spoke to Lexii’Foxx about what it means to actually be an ally to queer sex workers, picked the brain of Professor Mindy Seu on the associations between coding, sex, and politics, and recommended books on critical theory that wouldn’t send you doom-spiraling, among many other interviews and features that changed our perspectives and gave us hope for the year to come. We are honored that we’ve gotten to tell these stories for eight years now (it was our anniversary last month!) and can’t wait to continue alongside you in 2024.
best films of 2023
1. Past Lives dir. by Celine Song
recommended by @ettinger, @nicolezelcer, Clio Reynolds, Eva Schnarrenberger, @hotpinkfirespacecowboy, @jean.catherine, @carareilly, @96tilnicole, @alexandramorrisflint, and Sunny Shokrae
A story of ships passing in the night, unfulfilled potential, and complex longing for something that might no longer exist, Past Lives follows the story of two childhood friends who part ways when they leave Korea and find each other, again and again, always seemingly at the wrong place or time. The film is Celine Song’s feature directorial debut, and the story is loosely based off of events in her own life, which makes the ambiguous ache of love unexplored all the more poignant.
2. May December dir. by Todd Haynes
recommended by @venice7539, Meetra Javed, @jean.catherine, and @iris.diane
TW: statutory rape, grooming
May December tells the story of a method actress researching for a role in which she plays a real-life woman, Gracie, who got pregnant with the baby of 13-year-old Joe when she was 36. The film explores the complexities of family dynamics, the moral repercussions of grooming, and the stories people tell themselves so they can get through each day.
3. Anatomy of a Fall dir. by Justine Triet
recommended by @clemencepoles, meetra javed, and @hotpinkfirespacecowboy
TW: murder, suicide
This film is a French courtroom drama that follows novelist Sandra Voyter as she tries to prove her innocence in the case of her husband’s suspicious death. Dealing with thoughts of what it means to die and how death impacts the still-living, this film is a thought-provoking thriller that will leave you with as many questions as answers.
4. Fallen Leaves dir. by Aki Kaurismäki
recommended by @nicolezelcer and @violettearth
A Finnish-German tragicomedy set against the urban landscape of Helsinki, follows the life of a single woman, Ansa, navigating a mind-numbing job in a local supermarket. Fate intervenes when she encounters Holappa, an equally lonely man with alcoholism. The film explores the challenges of falling in love later in life, emphasizing the redemptive power of human connection as Holappa works to overcome his alcohol addiction. Fallen Leaves is another heart-rending tale of star-crossed lovers, and passerby club members were invited to an advanced screening—sign up for the club for more opportunities to see incredible films before everyone else.
5. Passages dir. Ira Sachs
recommended by @laurel2296 and @SJCramer#2815
In many movies, sex advances the plot or enhances the plot, but in Passages, sex is the plot—a brittle, convoluted poly situation forms when an ostensibly gay man cheats on his husband with a younger woman, played by Adèle Exarchopoulos, who seems to excel in erotic films. Hilarity ensues but so does hurt, and each character must reconcile their feelings of acceptance and rejection of each other and the situation time and time again. Passages feels like the defining “love story” of our time.
More of our favorite films include:
Menus-Plaisirs - Les Troisgros dir. by Frederick Wiseman (recommended by @clemencepoles, and @drexciyamoonstar)
The Iron Claw dir. by Sean Durkin (recommended by Natalie Guevara)
Evil Does Not Exist dir. by Ryusuke Hamaguchi (recommended by @drexciyamoonstar)
Beau is Afraid dir. by Ari Aster (recommended by Marina Sulmona and @clemencepoles)
How To Have Sex dir by (recommended by @SJCramer#2815 and @clemencepoles)
Poor Things by Yorgos Lanthimos (recommended by @texasjaynesawmassacre)
For even more, our founder Clémence Polès, has published her favorite films of 2023 here.
best books of 2023
1. Working Girl: On Selling Art and Selling Sex by Sophia Giovannitti
recommended by @cadetkelly
Sophia Giovannitti’s nonfiction book on sex work and its relationship with the art world challenges the assertion that sex and art are deemed sacred and intended to be shielded from the influences of the marketplace. She cites how that take contrasts so sharply with the reality of both being pillars of highly profitable industries. Writing from both personal and academic angles, Giovannitti challenges conventional notions about the sanctity of art and sex in the face of capitalist pressures.
Read Working Girl: On Selling Art and Selling Sex
2. The Bee Sting by Paul Murray
recommended by @kinsellaaa and @chloescarlet#4356
The Bee Sting reflects on tiny but pivotal moments, such as a patch of ice, a casual favor, and a bee under a bridal veil, that have led the Barnes family to an impossible predicament. The story questions whether a single stroke of bad luck can alter the trajectory of one's life and explores the possibility of finding a happy ending, even when the narrative seems predetermined.
Read The Bee Sting
3. Molly by Blake Butler
recommended by em seely-katz
TW: suicide
The poet Molly Brodak took her own life in 2020, and since then her widower, Blake Butler, has been trying to reckon with the depth of pain, both his and hers, surrounding this event. Molly delves into Brodak's complex psyche, revealing her self-destructive tendencies and the harm Butler couldn’t avoid in a simplistic eulogy. Butler's writing avoids facile judgments, resisting the temptation to label Molly as gaslighting or manipulative, even when the symptoms of her severe depression bleed onto the people around her. Instead, he presents her obsessions, dreams, and traumas with an unflinching gaze, allowing readers to navigate the murky waters of lyrical passages that infuse everyday betrayals with mythic significance.
Read Molly
4. The Guest by Emma Cline
recommended by @franswahs and Clio Reynolds
This short read revolves around a young woman living in a small coastal town. The protagonist encounters a mysterious and charismatic stranger, Suzanne, who unexpectedly becomes a guest in her home. As the two women spend time together, a complex dynamic emerges, blending elements of friendship and tension. The story delves into themes of identity, loneliness, and the allure of the unknown, weaving a narrative that explores the impact of fleeting connections on the lives of the characters involved.
Read The Guest
5. Kind Mirrors, Ugly Ghosts by Claire Donato
recommended by em seely-katz
You might forget you’re reading a book while reading this book. Claire Donato, a prolific poet and author, creates an experimental experience of poetic fiction that wades into unchartered territory, candidly exploring the abject corners of subjects that typically frighten, like death and intimacy, with a hand at once firm and tender. Pages explode with ASCII art, descriptions of how bumblebees mate, epistolary secret-sharing, and more fragments that coalesce into something ineffably special. Donato’s work can’t (and shouldn’t) be compared to anything, but fans of Clarice Lispector and Marguerite Duras should take special note of this book.
Read Kind Mirrors, Ugly Ghosts
honorable mentions
6. Land of Milk and Honey by C. Pam Zhang
recommended by @win_00
7. Big Swiss by Jen Beagin
recommended by @win_00
Read Big Swiss
8. Down the Drain by Julia Fox
recommended by Emily dawn long
Read Down the Drain
best albums of 2023
1. The Land is Inhospitable and So Are We by Mitski
recommended by @evaberezovsky, @jean.catherine, and @ClioReynolds
We’ve ALL heard the breakout song from this album, “My Love Mine All Mine,” but the less played-out tracks find Mitski indulging in life away from celebrity, social media, and all it entails, finding warmth and space to create in her relationships that seem to inspire each song on the album, with compositions ranging from bare-bones to operatic.
Listen to The Land is Inhospitable and So Are We
2. New Blue Sun by Andre 3000
recommended by clémence polès and @danamantooth
In his inaugural solo studio release after a loooong hiatus, Andre 3000 introduces an 87-minute album of "experimental flute music." Incorporating both acoustic and electronic instrumentation, the album draws inspiration from spiritual jazz musicians and minimalist composers, jams with Andre’s friends that he shapes into tracks imbued with feeling.
Listen to New Blue Sun
3. Girl With Fish by Feeble Little Horse
recommended by @toadoverload and @clemencepoles
The energizing noise-pop of Feeble Little Horse reaches a fever pitch in “Girl With Fish,” the lyrics gentle and harsh at the same time: “I gotta go ’cause you flash sadness.” With foamy, shoegaze-adjacent riffs and spikes of adrenaline-inducing shrieks, this album is easily listenable without losing its compelling edge.
Listen to Girl With Fish
4. Javelin by Sufjan Stevens
recommended by em seely-katz and @venice7539
This album is dedicated to Sufjan’s late partner, and it’s impossible to listen to without feeling its desperation, gently pawing its way out of loss and sorrow. Bringing the intimacy of “Carrie and Lowell” together with some of his more orchestral work, “Javelin” pierces the heart of pain and regret with lyrics like “I will always love you, but I cannot live with you”—is it unbearable to live with the “you” he sings about, or are they just gone forever?
Listen to Javelin
5. Raven by Kelela
recommended by @clemencepoles
"Raven," Kelela's second full-length album, emerges as a product of introspection—the album's dynamic sound seamlessly weaves between dance music and ambient noise, creating an intricate sonic landscape. There's a calmness surrounding the music, offering respite from the strife of being alive while simultaneously providing a space in which you can address them—kind of like the album version of the experience of being at a great club.
Listen to Raven
honorable mention
6. love & vex by ytboutthataction
recommended by @clemencepoles
Listen to love & vex
Find our favorites from each album rounded up in this playlist, and then keep the music playing with:
With a Hammer by Yaeji (recommended by @evaberezovsky)
The Record by boygenius (recommended by @jean.catherine, and @clioreynolds)
For even more, our founder, Clémence Polès, has published her favorite albums of 2023 here.
best television of 2023
1. The Bear (Hulu)
recommended by the passerby team
TW: suicide
The Bear’s season two lets Ayo Edebiri shine alongside the rest of the ensemble cast as the cameras move from a focus on Jeremy Allen White’s Carmy to include the trials and tribulations of the entire kitchen. It’s more uplifting than the first season, kind of like a sports story instead of a thriller, where the goalposts are the opening of the titular restaurant The Bear, a Michelin-star hopeful. In exploring the intensity of the kitchen environment, The Bear makes its point that it’s a blessing and a curse to have a calling, especially if it’s in cooking.
2. The Curse (Showtime)
recommended by the passerby team
The series unfolds around a newly married couple attempting to navigate the challenges of conceiving a child while co-starring on their ambitious, but demented, new HGTV show, "Flipanthropy." The narrative takes a twist as the couple contends with an alleged curse that disrupts their relationship and complicates their professional endeavors. The big non-spoiler twist is that the couple is played by…Emma Stone and Nathan Fielder. The chemistry and craziness generated in their interactions is what makes the show compelling.
Available to Stream on Showtime
3. Skip and Loafer (Crunchyroll)
recommended by em seely-katz
This beautifully animated “slice of life” show features the ambitious, earnest Mitsumi Iwakura through her first year of high school in “the big city” after growing up in a remote beachside town. The heartwarming chaos that ensues when Mitsumi meets the most Golden Retriever Boy you’ll ever see on screen is adorable, but even better are the relationships that develop between Mitsumi and her classmates as they navigate social anxiety, misguided assumptions, and the general awkwardness of being human that none of us ever really grow out of. Mitsumi inspires everyone around her with her guileless desire to be a force of good in the world, and she’ll inspire you, too.
Available to Stream on Crunchyroll
4. Beef (Netflix)
recommended by the passerby team
Ali Wong and Steven Yeun star in an unhinged comedy that begins with a simple instance of road rage and devolves into a bombastic, dangerous feud that sees the two main characters escalating their attempts to ruin each other’s lives to an extent that endangers everyone around them and sets off unthinkable chains of events. Wong and Yeun are at their best in Beef.
Available to Stream on Netflix
5. Telemarketers (HBO Max)
recommended by the passerby team
This true crime docuseries follows a group of beleaguered telemarketers who initially believe they are raising funds for firefighter and police charities when they uncover a shocking truth—that the money they thought was going to charitable causes is actually lining the pockets of their employers. When the call center is shut down, the two workers embark on a mission to expose the deceptive practices of the telemarketing industry. The story unfolds as they navigate the challenges of whistleblowing, shedding light on the exploitation within their workplace and striving for justice. Telemarketers explores themes of corporate deceit, ethical dilemmas, and the pursuit of accountability in the face of systemic wrongdoing.
Available to Stream on HBO Max
More shows to stream over the long winter nights include:
Platonic (recommended by @clemencepoles)
Top Boy (recommended by @clemencepoles)
Image header from Celine Song's Past Lives
Words by Em Seely-Katz